Summer To-Do List

1. Find a new secret river spot. Show all my friends.

2. Stay away from bars, hang out in backyards, only—for backyards are the province of summer.

3. Freeze coffee into ice cubes and get buzzed on ’em in the afternoon.

4. Go skate-camping (skamping!) in the woods of Central Oregon.

5. Cut out everything in my life that isn’t absolutely awesome—including the toxic shit and the shit that’s of zero note.

6. Live off chips and watermelon.

7. Find my passport (closet? underwear drawer?) and head north to Vancouver. Drink caesars. Befriend some new Canadians.